Northwood News ♦ June 2006

‘Action Group of One’ Takes on Poopers in the Park

By Fiona Morrissey

Everybody poops ... but not in our park, please!  Each and every Sunday during soccer season, organized teams of players with their families and supporters have been coming here to spend the day.  Our small neighborhood park was not designed for such numbers and has no bathrooms.  These people (many of whom speak no English and do not live in this area) instead of going elsewhere, choose to stay.  When nature calls, they relieve themselves in the bushes and woods, or up against the trunks of trees or even in the gully.  This has been going on for years and must be stopped!

A couple of weeks ago I formed an action group of one and got started.  Here’s what’s been happening so far.

Sunday, April 30
Stay at park from 11:30 a.m. till 4:00 p.m.  Bring pen, paper, and cellphone.  Persuade many children, all carrying pieces of toilet paper, from using the meadow as a bathroom.  Likewise, many mothers and teenagers.  Men less amenable; do not take kindly to being asked not to poop.  Change my strategy.  At a discreet distance, I follow two men into undergrowth, taking notes of their appearance.  As soon as I see them in action, I call park police.  Police come within 10 minutes.  After being identified, the poopers are charged with indecent exposure and public defecation.  Each fined $50.  Pity it’s not more.

Tuesday, May 2
Portapotty installed beside soccer field.  Progress!

Sunday, May 7
Go to park for about an hour to check portapotty is being used.  It is.

Sunday, May 14
To the park again with Marion, my first recruit.  Bad news.  Portapotty is in a filthy state so nobody’s using it.  Marion alerts the police.  They come, inspect the toilet, and inform us they will try to get someone to clean it a.s.a.p.

Tuesday, May 16
Portapotty still stinks.

Wednesday, May 17
I call up portapotty company and they say they will call the county.

Clearly we have a long way to go before this problem gets resolved.  We live in a highly urbanized area and cannot afford to have raw sewage lying around the only natural space we have left.

Marion and I need more volunteers to work with the police, the county, and the poopers themselves.  If you wish to join our action group, please call me at [contact details redacted].   ■